Clint and I were talking to some neighbors a couple of nights ago and the kids were in the driveway playing. Neither one of them had shoes on. Shep didn’t have a shirt on and that day he decided he didn’t like underwear, so his pants kept falling down. We saw a lot of his butt that day. Beau had food on his shirt and was drooling from teething, which has been status quo for the past 6 months.
I hadn’t put shoes on them because I thought we were just going to say hi, but we visited longer. So their feet were black from the asphalt (and it wasn’t that hot, so I wasn’t worried about the heat). Shep was digging in the dirt and had started throwing it on Beau.
Our kids were so messy with dirt, some leftover snack and drool (Beau) on their clothes. I looked to our neighbors who had a precious, delicate and clean little baby girl and said, “I promise our kids aren’t always this dirty.”
Clint said, “Umm … yeah they are.”
I remember reading this post when I was pregnant with Shep on ScaryMommy: Transitioning from One to Two Kids: Hello Shitshow.
I thought to myself, man is she dramatic. That’s a hilarious story but it wouldn’t ever happen to me. Until it did.
I always hesitate writing about the grossness of kids because of the fear of offending someone. But oh well, here it goes.
It all started on my picture-perfect day of having 4 whole hours with a babysitter where I got to sit at a quiet Starbucks and work on some content projects. I got so much done and felt totally accomplished. I was going to use the last 30 minutes to do some power grocery shopping (kid-free!). Fast forward I had $150 worth of groceries and realized I had none of my normal payment methods in my purse. I had $20 in cash and that’s it. I asked if my husband could pay over the phone (so embarrassing). No, they said. Fraud. So I left Kroger with no groceries and no almond milk for Beau (who has always had some issues with regular milk).
(I realize at this point I could have gone to the store now and saved myself a lot of problems the next day, but we ordered in pizza so I really got comfy watching Bravo and didn’t want to leave).
That night Beau had a sippy cup of regular milk and was totally fine. No problems in the morning either. I was hoping his sensitivity had passed, which would be amazing because I was tired of buying regular milk and almond milk all the time.
I got in the shower the next morning and put Beau in the Pack n’ Play while Clint watched him and also got ready. I get out of the shower to give Beau a kiss and realize Beau is playing in his poop. In his hands. His toes. His diaper is off and there are PILES in the Pack n’ Play.
Clint had quite a lovely wake up that morning to say the least.
Our morning consisted of a VERY thorough bath and lots of cleaning.
That had to be it, right? I headed to the grocery store and re-did my shopping (that was fun). Next, we were on our way to library time! Shep and Beau both love Storytime and Beau usually heads to the front of the Storytime to be front and center. Today was no exception, and he was hamming it up for all 30+ New Albany moms and caregivers. Then, out of nowhere, he goes Mamamama! And bam – BARF. Chunky milk throw up on the carpet and on him. The look of horror on the faces of moms terrified their kids had just been exposed to a stomach bug (I get it).
The day ended splashing in the pool and a cool cup of almond milk for Beau, but boy was my washing machine being tested, along with my sanity. Kids can be absolutely disgusting, can’t they?
I thought about what I could leave in this post that could be helpful besides me simply venting about my messy kids. So, here are 5 things that I use to attempt to (but usually fail) keeping up with these messy boys:
- Roomba – I set this up right when they go down for nap most days and start my evening with much, much cleaner floors.
- Meyer’s Hand Soap – I wash my hands a lot during the day, and a lot of the other soaps left my hands super dry and cracked. I love this one and rotate the scents to keep life interesting.
- BeautyCounter Kids Bath Collection – I love these soaps for kids, especially when I end up having to bathe them once (or twice!) a day. The soap is mild on their skin and I have confidence in their ingredients. My friend Jennifer at The Champagne Supernova is a consultant and knows lots about all the awesome things about BeautyCounter. Check it out here.
- Whispering Angel Rose – After watching some terrible Bravo show in the spring, Clint and I both love this Rose. When days are extra messy like the one mentioned above, we open this up.
- Griffin Side Table – I’ve started updating our living room furniture to this reclaimed wood collection since it’s much, much easier to keep clean. There is so such thing as smudges when it comes to reclaimed wood and I’m loving our new side table!
Now looking back on that article, I 100% agree that parenting two little kids, while rewarding and joyful as it is, can at time be a complete shitshow. Can you agree?
On to the linkup!